I respectfully disagree.
Photography is a creative pursuit and therefore we are free to do whatever. HDR "should" be anything it can be. The only reason you see yours as more "real" is because BW photos already have a history in our culture. If someone were to have just invented BW photos, I am sure many people would say they look ridiculous. And if overprocessed HDRs had been around since 1820, I am sure they would be seen as great works of art. Especially considering that most folks who look at an overprocessed HDR think it looks like a painting. They are responding to the fact that overprocessed HDRs have the same tonality as paintings did before photography came along. Photography is actually pretty poor at capturing all the visible tones in a scene, we were once able to get them all in using a painting, then photography came along and all of a sudden we all think 9-10 Zones (Exposure Values) is the maximum possible to squeeze into a picture.
I agree that the overprocessed HDRs look odd, but only because we are not used to them. There is nothing a photo should be. Photography is not math, there is no right or wrong answer.
Sorry for the rant. I am a professional photographer and come across this type of bias all the time, so it is a personal pet peeve of mine.