Sometimes life deals you lemons...

[jes72mustang]

Well, I have not been on here a lot lately, and I don't know how much I will be on for a while. Unfortunatly, the mustangs and the hobby will have to take a back seat to a little bit of life restoration.

A few weeks ago, my wife of 15+ years informed me that she was not sure she still wanted to be married. Then a week or so later, informed me she had become "emotionally" involved with someone else, a mutual friend (who is also married) no less. She says she wants to move out. she is not say divorce for sure yet, but if I wouldn't want her back after all this she would understand. She also keeps saying that she wants us to remain friends and be good "Co-Parents" for our 4 kids. She has said she also wants me to keep the house. At this point she is not talking about pushing for spousal or child support as long as we can play nice through all this. She is trying to find a place to rent in the same school district then the kids could be at the house like everyday after school until she would get home from work and I would have them every other weekend.

Divorce laws really suck in PA. Even though I didn't do anything other than giver her and the kids everything, be supportive in everything she ever wanted to do, be a good husband and father, I stand to lose everything if I don't play nice and she gets mad. In her own words I didn't do anything wrong to deserve this, so why is she doing it then.

Oh yeah and I am going to have to trade my 02 GT for something tthat seats at least 5 people. Probably going to be some little rice burner to save money on gas and payment. I really like that car.

So anyway, I will probably be checking in from time to time, but doubt I will be very active here for a while.

 

[StangDreamin']

Ooooofffff. That hurts.
I'm really sorry for you man; and to be honest, I think the '02 GT is about the very least of your heartache. This morning like every morning I woke up and, before even opening my eyes, I said my first two prayers:
#1) Thank you for letting me wake up next to this woman I can't live without.
#2) Please please let me wake up next to her tomorrow and for the next 25 years.

A lot of people would be screaming "Kick her to the curb" right now; and crying about the Stang. Not me. I know what's more important to you. And a lot of guys aroiund here can honestly say they know where your head is right now. Again, not me. Like I said; I fervently pray every morning that I'll never have to know where your mind is right now.

 

[rbohm]

start with marriage counseling. if she refuses, hire a good attorney, and private detective. i am betting that even in pa divorce laws are such that if you can prove fault on her side, you lose little.

 

[krash kendall]

Good luck man...do whatever is best for the kids. Trying to send each other to the poor house won't do anybody any good. Just be sure to iron out the details and get it in writing. And I agree - who cares about the car?

 

[88gt]

Sorry for what you are going through..

Mine was similar, I hired a good attorney/PI/and spent a ton of money.

I have full custody of my son and I got the house.

She went away for about 8 years and is just now begining to be a part of his life.

Do what is right for the kids....all you can do.

 

[allcarfan]

If she admitted that she was 'emotionally' involved with someone else, well, we all know what that means and a PI should be able to get proof of that. Adultery, I think, makes the laws nearly null and void.

At least you made it 15 years. My exwife and I made it a whopping 5 months. Same deal..."you can have everything, you didnt do anything to deserve this."

What a load of crap

 

[BDT 1967]

That sucks and it scares the hell out of me

 

[88gt]

My recently aquired '65 fastback has the title in my first and last name only. If I ever get in this position again, car goes to dad for a while....(prove it's not his)..p.s. my dad and I have the same first and last name-middle names are different----

protect yourself....always!!!

 

[351carlo]

I am very sorry to hear of your difficulties. Everything takes a back seat to such a situation and I'm sure it can tear you apart.

I know as a child, this was always a fear of mine. I wouldn't want to be with the person who caused it. I'm not sure how old the kids are, or what their situation is, but if your relationship with them is anything like my family, they will want to stay with you. You've gotta decide what is best for them, and let them have some say if they're old enough.

If you need the names of good attorneys, I have a few from the Philadelphia area. They are trusted people who would be able to recommend the BEST for you.

Don't give in to losing everything after you've already had to part ways with her. Fight for what you've built. I'm not saying to make her broke, but you didn't get to where you are today only to lose it because she decided to leave.

I'm sorry again.

 

[Taranis]

I wish you the best of luck in whatever your decision may be. I know many people who have had bitter divorces and it is something that I hope I never have to go through.

 

[68keyblr]

Sorry to hear about your situation, from someone who has been through it. You should see a laywer early on to understand your options and the law.

You can be sure that the dishonesty she's revealed so far is just the 'tip of the iceberg." There's lots more to come, and you'll find out she's done alot more behind your back than you ever imagined. Hang in there and keep to the high road and you'll be alright. Don't rely on her "goodwill" to have a clean divorce. She will stab you in the back to get what she wants, someone who is capable of cheating on you is capable of lots more too. Make sure your interests are protected with an attorney. Just my .02. Good luck