OT just a guy in pain needing advice

[Jsmiley]

I love my girlfriend...but she is a little younger than me and she is not quite ready to be an adult whereas I am...I am desperately trying to be mature responsible and enter the adult stage of my life (just turned 18 4 months ago and moved out of parents house, and got my first adult job at vancouver ford). Well Sunday night she calls me and I ask why she is calling, not cause I am annoyed but because I simply am curious to know what is up. Well this really pisses her off and she says I won't be hearing from her for awhile. However, I can be pretty persuasive to women I guess cause I got her to let me come over and talk her through things last night and after about an hour I get some freaky news that she may be pregnant but other than that she is calm about the night before again, calm enough that she starts kissing heavily on me..well during this relationship I have neglected my best friend and I promised him that last night we would hang out. My girlfriend while kissing me proceeds to do some more sexual things that I did not ask her to do...about 30 seconds into this I say "babe I really gotta go I promised frank (my buddy) that I would see him tonight, we haven't done anything in months. I just wanted to come over and let you know I never intended to hurt you last night." Well at this she freaks out and kicks me out of her house and goes and gets drunk with her other guy friends and girlfriends. I don't know what to do I love the girl and never intend to hurt her but sometimes I am dumb and make mistakes and it is EXTREMELY difficult to get her to listen to me after that..sorry for the really long post I just need to talk and there is no one here I can talk to.

 

[302fordracer]

whoops I was logged in under my roomates name that was actually my post.

 

[Stangfreak95]

Seems that she is not too mature, like you said. I had one like that a few years back...I was 2 years older than her. I wasnt seeing my friends anymore, was always with her..We were fighting all the time over little things. When she was upset, she was going drinking with some guy friends, just to make me jealous. DId she threated you about her commiting suicide also? Hope not. If not, dont waste your time anymore. It will be hard but it's all for the best.

I dont really know what to tell you. But your story kinda reminds me of mine.. I know I did the right decision back then. Today, she's now 22..Two kids from 2 different guys (not me), married with some guy to get him citizenship, etc. All kind of chit like than. I'm glad I pulled back a few years ago..

Good luck.

 

[302fordracer]

she has not threatened suicide but she has other ways to make me feel guilty...

 

[stunner6910]

i was a little younger when i went through what you're going through. i was 16 and she was 15. we didn't drink of course. we were always together and about after a year, i had lost communication with all of my buddies and all we did was fight. i had to constantly watch what i was about to say cause she would have a chitbreak. i couldn't even go to the store without her getting pissed, she was a freak, but she was beautiful freak and that's why i didn't want to leave her until i had to. trust me man, it's all for the best, since that relationship, i have not stood up any friends of mine and still come through with my girl. i'm 21 now and am close to getting marred.i guess i'm lucky i went through that when i was that young cause it helped me get control over my other relationships.

TIP: If she ain't you're wife or even close, she's not worth losing your friends over.

 

[AznStanger3v]

I love my girlfriend...but she is a little younger than me and she is not quite ready to be an adult whereas I am...I am desperately trying to be mature responsible and enter the adult stage of my life (just turned 18 4 months ago and moved out of parents house, and got my first adult job at vancouver ford). Well Sunday night she calls me and I ask why she is calling, not cause I am annoyed but because I simply am curious to know what is up. Well this really pisses her off and she says I won't be hearing from her for awhile. However, I can be pretty persuasive to women I guess cause I got her to let me come over and talk her through things last night and after about an hour I get some freaky news that she may be pregnant but other than that she is calm about the night before again, calm enough that she starts kissing heavily on me..well during this relationship I have neglected my best friend and I promised him that last night we would hang out. My girlfriend while kissing me proceeds to do some more sexual things that I did not ask her to do...about 30 seconds into this I say "babe I really gotta go I promised frank (my buddy) that I would see him tonight, we haven't done anything in months. I just wanted to come over and let you know I never intended to hurt you last night." Well at this she freaks out and kicks me out of her house and goes and gets drunk with her other guy friends and girlfriends. I don't know what to do I love the girl and never intend to hurt her but sometimes I am dumb and make mistakes and it is EXTREMELY difficult to get her to listen to me after that..sorry for the really long post I just need to talk and there is no one here I can talk to.

apparently, that smooth talking you do has gotten you in some trouble. First off, you mightve knocked her up. second, you turned her bananas. i feel for you bro. its a shame assualt and battery is a crime sometimes well to help you, i hope she isnt pregnant. i dont know how you feel about abortion, so ill keep that to myself. i think you need to sit her down and straighten her out. my gf tried that funny stuff until i layed down the law with her. need to tell you gf to put the bottle down as well for two reasons:
1. if shes pregnant, that baby isnt benifitting from the booze
2. shes underage, this is why there are age restrictions on things like these.

you are the one who is right. good luck

 

[stunner6910]

just saw you're other post, when she tries to make you feel guilty, just act as if you are feeling it and let her leave thinking that. then go out with your buddies and have a good time. this way, she'll think she knows how to control you but you know it's just a front. she'll feel worse if she knows you went out partying even after all she said. JUST DON'T LET IT GET TO YOU, women have a lot of ways of making men feel guilty about nothing

 

[jermy82]

Get rid of her. You can't be with someone who is insecure and short tempered especially if you're nothing like her. Had someone just like her a couple years back and was miserable. Finally cut it off (slowly but surely) and was much happier afterwards. She found some guy that she calls me and complains about every so often, but people like that just don't know how to be happy. Find someone older or at least more mature.

 

[rudeone707]

dude its not worth all the drama staying with a girl like that. Sounds like you need someone a lil more mature and understanding. The worst thing chicks can do is ruin your friendship with your boys, i know it mught hurt to break it off, but youll find the one one day.

 

[302fordracer]

thanks guys for your advice...I am still unsure what I will do for a decision like this I must give some thought. Where I am at right now is telling her how I feel about the situation, that I am able to leave and see my friends because it is wrong to turn my back on those that have always been there for me..so I am gonna lay down the law and see where that goes if she doesn't accept it then that is it I guess..and 17 year old stanger you are right she should not be drinking right now I will defintely mention it..but I am pretty sure she won't have the baby..

 

[302fordracer]

well here is some very relieving news...she just started her period, it was quite late but finally happened..

 

[HazMat404]

i say i give you some more reliveing news and say get rid of her. you are pretty young (im 22) and ive been through a ton of *****. been cheated on by girls, dumped for no reason after a year, played like no other....blah blah. ive done pretty much the same thing in reverse because of it. like i said, you are young....get it outta your system and go have fun. hell, i wish i had my own place now cause of all the fun you could have. i loved college for that reason alone.

personally i think you are safe cause she isnt pregnant and get rid of her. way too many girls out there that wont screw around with you (if you are that persuasive then you wont have a problem ). g'luck

 

[5.0_GT_kid]

I say just get rid of her, or at least let her get the message that you're going to. It's obvious she has lost respect for you and if you do like 17yroldstanger said and lay down the law, that'll get the respect back usually.

You'll be amazed how quick she might straighten up if you make it clear she either straightens up or finds herself single REAL soon.

*DISCLAIMER: Extra emphasis on the word might in that last sentence, you may just have a flake on your hands who will always be insane*

 

[SuperDust22]

I went though that whole thing a few months ago. Plus my gf is in ireland right now. She has been acting like a bitch for a month now. I don't know what to do with her. I love her but she can be a complete dumb ass sometimes. I just got in a fight with her on the phone about two minutes ago.

Dustin

 

[Sleepy McNastee]

You will be amazed how much money you have to spend on your car if you break it off with the ol' gf. It might suck being single, but damn, you can go crazy on your mods.

I broke it off with my ex girlfriend and I have not looked back.Since that relationship I have got H/C/I, full exhaust, new wheels...the list goes on. And I can play the field and not feel guilty.


Then, when your car is where you want it, give up the one night stands and commit to a real relationship.

 

[mystang94gt]

You will be amazed how much money you have to spend on your car if you break it off with the ol' gf. It might suck being single, but damn, you can go crazy on your mods.

I broke it off with my ex girlfriend and I have not looked back.Since that relationship I have got H/C/I, full exhaust, new wheels...the list goes on. And I can play the field and not feel guilty. .

OMFG! I have been debating whether to break up with my gf for that reason alone!! I just know I would have a lot more money to spend on mods without the dinners, lunches, movies ect. She can be a pain in the ass too but honesly I have yet to find one that wasnt a pain in the ass for one reason or another.

Just be glad she isnt pregnant and make sure she stays that way. All relationships have ups and downs, but getting drunk with guys to get back at you is some That's something you cant stand for and something that would make me question her intentions. Either lay down the law or show her the door.

 

[Mrgreen94gt]

The longest, and pretty much only real relationship that I've had in the last four years has been with my car. We've had our rough spots and plenty of problems, but we're still together.

If someone can't get along with your friends then they probably BARELY get along with you.

 

[BlackVert]

i'm 44. i got married at 24, which was way too young. i did not date nearly enough, and married my 3rd girlfriend. i did not really know who i was, what i wanted in life, and what my passions were. looking back, i made some poor decisions ... learn from me.

i have news for you: at 18 and younger, neither of you is mature yet. you will not really be mature until you get through school, get yourself settled, and really know who you are and what you are about.

i hope for everyone's sake that she is not pregnant. a baby right now is not good for anyone, not you, her, either of your parents, or the baby. please be careful with sex, abortion is really traumatic and you are too young to have a child.

my advise: break up with her, go to college (work your way through if you have to -- it's really important, it will open up so many more doors for you), date alot, and maybe start looking for a mate around 30. by then, you should have your life in order and know who you are and what you want.

 

[stunner6910]

i'm 44. i got married at 24, which was way too young. i did not date nearly enough, and married my 3rd girlfriend. i did not really know who i was, what i wanted in life, and what my passions were. looking back, i made some poor decisions ... learn from me.

i have news for you: at 18 and younger, neither of you is mature yet. you will not really be mature until you get through school, get yourself settled, and really know who you are and what you are about.

i hope for everyone's sake that she is not pregnant. a baby right now is not good for anyone, not you, her, either of your parents, or the baby. please be careful with sex, abortion is really traumatic and you are too young to have a child.

my advise: break up with her, go to college (work your way through if you have to -- it's really important, it will open up so many more doors for you), date alot, and maybe start looking for a mate around 30. by then, you should have your life in order and know who you are and what you want.

WORDS OF WISDOM!!

 

[stang976]

hmmm..is it just me? i would flip out if my GF went drinking with other guys no matter what kind of quarrel we were in. i wouldnt hit a girl but i would have no problem hitting the guys she was with. maybe im just an overprotective, jealous, skitzophrenic, control freak?