I JUST HAD TO POST THIS..... Please keep in mind that I pulled this from many posts off a Dodge Dakota site. I was looking for a trunk lid liner in yahoo and saw this headline "You know you drive a ricer if..." I just had to look. SO. HERE GOES...... if your speakers are bigger than your wheels. if you can put your head in your exhaust tip. if you can't fit your hand in the engine compartment. if you think 100hp is a lot If your engine is smaller than a bottle of coke if you can pull a string to wind it up. If you think that "Stickers" are a major mod. If you have a sticker that says "Got NOS?" and you dont even have it. If you can push it around the parking lot like a shopping cart with that rear wing...... "Powered by Honda" sticker on a .....yep, a Honda... "If speed kills then honda owners must live forever" H.O.N.D.A. Hold On Not Done Accelerating C.I.V.I.C. Can I Violate Inocent Christians? sorry lol PRELUDE PRE Lubricated under developed Engine Accord...According to the time slip....IT's SLOW S.I. Slow Indeed A.C.C.O.R.D. Anemic Car Can't Outrun Reliable Dodge you only need one header when you and your buddy can pick up your car and move it out of your parking spot The Rims cost more than the car! you change the soy sauce every 3 months or 3000 miles, which ever comes first. the kid next door can do a better burn out on his bicycle. you have a VTEC sticker on a pre-VTEC car. someone asked you to open the hood and you don't know how because you have never looked at that part of your car before and after you get the hood open you can't find the engine you are beaten by a ford ranger you have a "Powered by honda" sticker on your toyota you get pulled over for accelerating too slow one of the factory options was sushi and an eggroll. your choices of fuel are: Brown, White, or Instant. SMALL SIDE STORY: (not written by me) A bunch of my freinds worked at an auto parts store in high school and one day i was in b.s.ing with one of em when this guys comes in... He goes up to my freind at the parts counter as i retreated to an aisle. "yeah, im looking to get some new tires and wheels for my car" "ok sir, what year make and model is it?" "its a 93 ford festiva, im looking to get some bigger wheels, maybe some lower profile tires" "well it looks like youve got 12 in stock wheels on there" "yeah, i was thinking maybe a 13 or 14 inch wheel" "well sir, we dont really carry much in those sizes they arent too popular" "what about those ones?"pointing at the wall "uhhh, well those are trailer wheels" "oh" after that i was laughing too hard to remember what happened after, but all i remember is he was a tall white guy with a mullet... driving a festiva... lookin for some performance Your lawnmower and/or chainsaw have a deeper, throatier tone than your car. You looked long and hard for that 5hp model You hate when it rains because you have to stand behind the car and pull the little string to get your car started. You start your car to warm it up and go back into the house and your parents ask you to put the weed eater away when you’re done. You drive by a park and people start swatting because the sound of your car makes them think bugs are buzzing around their heads. The only thing louder than your coffee-can muffler is the sound of the metal on metal grinding sound the 8-12" subs stuffed in back make as they shake every bolt holding your car together loose. when you drive down the street your muffler sounds like QUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR!!! You have a five inch exhaust tip and the rest of your exhaust is one inch. You put clear lights and a lowering kit on your car and you call it "HIGH PERFORMANCE". when your bottle of soda displaces more than your cars engine you own stock in Uncle Ben. Uncle Ben IS your uncle. your exhaust tip has "Maxwell house" or "Folgers" written on it. your car is covered in pollen. you start your car in the morning and your neighbor yells "turn off the d*mn leaf blower/weedeater!! its 7 am!!" when asked what kinda mods you have, the first 3 words of your reply contain "neon". I HAVE NEONS your race car is the 4 door accord your mom used to pick you up at school in. you get those lightweight seats that dont match your interior, yet put on many extra pounds of audio equipment, useless fiberglass, and large shiny muffler tips you have a sticker that says "heartbeat of Tokyo" !!!!