a few old jokes...

[MI95Cobra]

i was at work today and heard a few old jokes that i haven't heard in awhile and decided to share....

#1 what is micheal jackson's favorite chinese food????
- cream of sum yung guy

#2 what is in between a snowman's legs?
- snowballs

#3 their is this irish man named o'connell and he says, "man i've built bridges, but do they call me o'connell the bridge builder? no. I've built boats, but do they call my o'connell the boat builder? no. But you have sex with one goat!!!!!

well what do you think???

 

[AznStanger3v]

...................

 

[95cobraguy]

your mom is so fat she has to fedex the food to her stomach.
your mom is so old i told her to act her age and the bitch dropped dead.
your mom is like a shotgun, 2 cocks and she blows.
your mom is so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.
tell your mom to stop using different color lipstick, my d-ck is turning rainbow.
dont worry guys, my flame suit was put on before i started posting.

 

[WhiteStallionGT]

"your mom is so fat she has to fedex the food to her stomach"

holy**** I burst out laughing so hard

 

[parchisi]

Two eskimos are in a kyak and they get cold. They start a fire but the fire sinks their kyak. Just goes to show that you can't have your kyak and heat it too. (say this aloud if you don't get it)

On the way home from the office every day, a doctor stops by a bar where the bartender usually has a Hazelnut Daquiri waiting for him. One day the bartender finds he ran out of hazelnut flavoring, so he substitutes with hickory instead. The doctor comes in, tastes it, and immediately says "This isn't a hazelnut daquiri!" The bartender says, "You're right! Its a Hickory Daquiri Doc!"

Two friars are beginning to run out of money for their monastary, so they decide to start selling flowers. Everybody wants to buy flowers from holy men, so the friars make good business, but they start putting the other florists out of business. The other florists plead with the friars to stop selling flowers, but the friars won't listen. So the florists hire the most notorious thug in town, Hugh Smith. Hugh goes into the friars shop, trashes the shop, and beats up the friars. The friars finally agree to stop selling flowers. This goes to show that Hugh, and only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

 

[AznStanger3v]

well.. since everyone is getting in on it, i guess i could spare a couple minutes to embarass myself and look like a clown:

-Why are women's feet so small? So they can stand closer to the stove
-Why don't women need umbrellas? It doesnt rain between the kitchen and the bedroom
-If a man hits a woman with his motorcycle, whose fault is it? THE MANS! he shouldnt be riding his motorcycle in the kitchen
-Womans suffrage

i guess you can see my favorite type of jokes they are only jokes, so no need for anyone to get butthurt, especially you guys of Team Feelings

 

[MI95Cobra]

ok, so now a few blonde jokes....

there is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette all sitting in a doctors office pregnant and waiting to see the doctor...the redhead goes i'm going to have a girl cause i was on bottom, the brunette says i'm going to have a boy cause i was on top, the blonde starts crying, the other two women ask the blonde what wrong, the blonde replies, " I'm Going To Have Puppies"

whats a blondes left leg say to her right leg??? nothing they have never met

there is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette all in the 4th grade, which one looks better??? the blonde she's been there for 5 years....

whats the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator??? nothin, they both get eatin out of....