A little help from u divorced guys please

[stanmckinney]

Why can't we all get along?
I'm going into therapy.

 

[Jenns01TA]

Oh, my goodness. BREATH is a noun. BREATHE is a verb. Here we go!

I can't fighure out if I want to go with or



Screw the grammar; I want to hear the ex bashing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Agreed.

You and Tim (timeless2) need to hook up. He calls me on these types of things all the time. Maybe you guys could get together and play D&D, or discuss Star Wars trivia sometime?

They need to pull Stan into the triangle of anal-retentivity. (LOVE YOU STAN - just poking fun.)

Why can't we all get along?
I'm going into therapy.

Come back and play. I know you can add to J's trailer epitaphs dedicated to his ex-wife.


My nightly addition:
Lubricants are only needed for maintenance, not intimacy.

 

[jlisle01]

I'd use some version of "never has a headache" except that it's both a little too common and completely not true. She apparently NEVER had a headache, even when she should have.

And if any one needs therapy it's me. Trailer epitaphs, and it's been three years! It is funny though.

 

[Hoboattacker]

"I won't spend the night in jail for slamming this one up against the wall?"

I'm sorry....but I about died when I read this

 

[kooldawg6]

(to your competitors)You have no choice but to see her from behind, whether you want too or not...

 

[kooldawg6]

AND...I'm quite shocked that none have posted this...yet(has it been overlooked )
A bad day at the track is still better than a good day with the ex.

 

[kooldawg6]

You actually spend time making sure that the car's "toe" is perfect...

 

[stanmckinney]

I've been married to the same woman for 27 years. If that doesn't require therapy, I don't know what does.
Gee, I hope she doesn't read that.

 

[dans89lx]

I'd use some version of "never has a headache" except that it's both a little too common and completely not true. She apparently NEVER had a headache, even when she should have.

And if any one needs therapy it's me. Trailer epitaphs, and it's been three years! It is funny though.

ouch lol...case and point.

 

[jlisle01]

AND...I'm quite shocked that none have posted this...yet(has it been overlooked )
A bad day at the track is still better than a good day with the ex.

Thats it! That will be the last one.

....and the number one reason my race car is better than my ex-wife
1. My worst day ever at the track was still better than my best day with that B.

 

[kooldawg6]

I've been married to the same woman for 27 years. If that doesn't require therapy, I don't know what does.
Gee, I hope she doesn't read that.

If she does, you just might need therapy...physical therapy...

 

[Kevindust]

- There are more than three options when it comes to intakes.

- I won't go to jail for applying forced induction.

 

[Joe Fan]

Add another:

The only time she screams like a Bit@h is when I want her to.

 

[LuckyFlyinROUSH]

Works if you have a supercharger lol

10. When I get on her I don't want to get off, and when I get on her really hard she screams!

 

[DukeOfValencia]

How about...
My car doesn't come with a mother-in-law...

 

[jlisle01]

Thanks for all the suggestions guys. This thread has lost me ten pounds, lowered my blood pressure five points, and saved me $21,000 in therapy fees.

:SNSign:

So, it looks like IT'S going to be....

The Top Ten Reasons my Race Car is Better than my Ex-Wife

10. I only had to pay for my race car once.
9. With my race car, the more money I put in her the more she puts out.
8. The only time my race car runs around is when I'm driving it.
7. My race car only blows noise and noxious fumes out of ONE end.
6. A race car doesn't require therapy to maintain its ideal weight.
5. Smaller rear end designed for fun handling.
4. Firmer front end that can be tightened up when it starts to sag.
3. The car doesn't look fatter in stripes.
2. I don't quite know how to put this, but, well, I've never
found it hard to stay awake immediately after driving my race car.

And the number one reason my race car is better than my ex-wife.....

1. My worst day ever at the track was still a better one than my best
day with that bitch.

 

[kooldawg6]

WOOT